What was the most memorable part of this past month?
Going to Minnesota and putting an offer in on a house, which was accepted. Then going through the process of buying our first home.
What were the three biggest lessons you’ve learned in this past month?
1. It’s okay to not be perfect. Well, more like it’s okay to not appear perfect. Everybody wants to appear put together and perfect but sometimes that just isn’t possible. That’s fine. My house is disorganized and chaotic and that’s okay. That’s the stage of life I’m in with 3 kids. Stressing myself out and stressing everyone around me out because I want to appear perfect and put together just isn’t worth it.
2. If it’s meant to be, it will be. As I said above, we put an offer in on a house in the suburbs of Minneapolis-St. Paul. I love the house and it would fit our family perfectly. It’s everything Nick and I wanted. Obviously, because we loved it we wanted our offer to be accepted but we had no control over that. So Nick and I had to patiently wait to hear from our realtor and hope that all would work out. If it didn’t then that house wasn’t meant to be and there will be something for us down the road. Luckily, this house was meant to be!
3. Not accepting others is not okay. I’m not talking about accepting others poor behavior. What I’m talking about is not accepting others based on judgments and assumptions. People are who they are. People are messy, insecure, emotional, immature, and beautiful. We all should be a little forgiving of people and set out to understand then instead of judging them based on what they see instead of what they know.
How are you different between this past month and the month before it?
I’ve done a much better job in April of communicating my emotions effectively and also not letting my emotions take over and cause problems where they don’t need to be any. When I feel anxious I say that I’m feeling anxious and why I feel that way. I no longer bottle it up until I explode because when it explodes nothing gets betters.
What or who are you especially grateful for this past month?
My husband Nick. He really pulled through the entire month from helping me get the house cleaned, organized and packed to getting pre-approved and finding a house. Nick hasn’t always been the most mature and he isn’t the best at follow through but he really is trying hard to show up.
Name three things you can improve on next month. What are concrete actions you can take to work towards these improvements?
1. I want to try to be more open about my feelings at the moment when something hurts me. I tend to turn inwards instead of expressing it. Then I’m just hurt and I stay hurt. It would be better for me to at least express how I feel with the understanding that the person may not care but at least giving the person the chance to clear the air with me.
2. I want to take more responsibility for making my life better. In the past, I’ve sat by and watch my life go by with little to no action in getting myself what I wanted. Then I’d complain that I didn’t have the life I wanted. Instead of waiting for the things I want in life I’m going to start actively pursuing them. If that means I take a 6-month course to get certified for a job I’m interested in then great. If that means joining a bunch of mom groups to make friends then bring it on. I’m tired of watching from the sidelines instead of playing the game.
3. I want to be more present. It is so easy to just zone out on my phone or computer and not really take in my surrounding or the people around me. I’ve always been an introvert who liked being totally independent of other people. That makes it so easy to just disconnect from the world. I want to turn off the screens and start taking in the people and places in my life.
From 1-10, how do you feel overall about this past month?
10! April was an amazing month for me. I got to visit with family, got my house clean, found a house I love and want to live in for the next 40 years. Mine and Nick’s relationship has improved a lot and our whole family dynamic has gotten so much better. I’m in a really happy place and I just want to keep that going.